And then, you came.

He was my last match that I am still chatting with before I decided to uninstall whatsoever dating apps that I had in my phone.

Somewhat different personality and character, it felt safe and comfortable chatting with him.

He made me felt safe talking to him with his simplicity in thoughts.

Things were fine, we met few times. Exploring food, chatting over coffee and did some activities.

And then, somewhere somehow I felt like some things started changing.

Less conversation and communication over phone, daily chats became few days chats.

Gaps is getting bigger, I felt. And it's just all me, and my thoughts all over again.

I felt the cycle is coming back, in a way I will most certainly feel confused, keep waiting, and having multiple thoughts. 

Again, am wondering why is this happening to me so often for every single time when I met someone new.

I do not want to go through the whole roller coaster journey which makes me unrecognizable of myself.

I cannot lose myself again.

Remember Jac, 

Things will gravitate back to you if its meant for you.

You have tried your very best in everything, and if he walks away - then so be it.

You are certainly worth more than this and you deserve to feel happy, and not lonely in the process.

Focus in people who puts you first and is always there when you need them.

Because, they are your person.